Forgotten Film: Eight Legged Freaks (2002)

Forgotten Films: Eight Legged Freaks (2002)

This is the 11th in my series of Forgotten Obscure or Neglected Films

I have a shameful secret. I like giant bug and animal movies. Some of you are already rolling your eyes at me. I can tell. Give me “The Giant Gila Monster”, “Them!”.or “Konga” and I am in Heaven. My wife on the other hand thinks she is in some other place while this is happening.

When I first saw “Eight Legged Freaks” I knew I was seeing something special. This is what “Arachnophobia” wanted to be but failed. A wonderful blend of outrageous fantasy, squeamish horror, and fun that never loses sight of any of these areas.

And there is an inspired cast here. David Arquette is leading the way with all the goofiness you could want. He plays Chris McCormick, a ne’er do well who has left the small Arizona mining town of Liberty after decking his girlfriend’s boyfriend. At least he thinks of her as his girlfriend. He’s never really bothered to totally define that relationship. It’s been a while. The girlfriend, Samantha Parker played by Kari Wuhrer, is now a mother of two, divorced, and making ends meet as the town sheriff. And it is amazing how tight some law enforcement uniforms can get. Both the deputy and the sheriff test some fabric strength, though in different areas.

Her son, Mike (played by Scott Terra, a good down to earth name) is fascinated by science and science fiction and has befriended the local supplier of spiders, snakes, and reptiles to universities and labs. He has an amazing collection of spiders. Unbeknownst to him, radioactive toxic waste has been dumped nearby and it has a truly nasty effect on spiders. They grow large and aggressive. When a case is accidentally disturbed, he is attacked and the whole holding area is wrecked while he fights in vain to get out. The spiders now have a small food source. And the mines provide a wonderful place to hide and grow.

Pretty soon local pets begin to be missed. Local talk radio/conspiracy nut DJ Harlan (wonderfully played by Doug E. Doug) is sure the government is behind it all. It always is. And there is a wonderful scene where Deputy Pete Willis watches his cat go toe-to-toe with a spider inside the sheetrock. Well, he does not actually see the fight. He sees impressions of the cat formed as the spider smashes it into the wall board. Some of the puzzled cat’s expressions are just wonderful.

Pretty soon Liberty is under siege from the spiders and the townsfolk fight or die pretty fast. The survivors end up in the local (empty) mall that never got the business it had expected. When the spiders attack they grab anything they can find to defend themselves, including chainsaws, baseball bats, and pitchforks. The townspeople are one of the things that makes this film work. They are great quirky folks.

Everyone plays well over the top, especially Arquette who gets to climb a radio tower while being chased by spiders while trying to get a cell phone signal. When he gets an answer he asks the army to come save them from “these eight legged freaks!” Wonderful stuff.

Some great character actors in this film, including Leon Rippy as the corrupt mayor, Rick Overton as Deputy Pete, and Eileen Ryan as chain smoking myopic Aunt Gladys. Oh, and I can’t not mention Scarlett Johansson. She was 18 when this was released and it was her last film before people started noticing her. Her next two films were “Lost in Translation” and “The Girl With the Pearl Earring”.

If you have not seen this and anything I have described appeals to you, do not hesitate. You can thank me later. If, however, giant spiders bother you, give this a pass.

Series organizer Todd Mason hosts more Tuesday Forgotten Film reviews at his own blog and posts a complete list of participating blogs.